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How To Handle Their Ego, But What About Yours?

Your ego goes to work whenever someone challenges your abilities, especially your abilities to take care of your business, your quick and instinctive reaction is to show them they are wrong! When using this tactic, be cautious not to damage the ego. EXTREMELY IMPORTANT: If you cause damage instead of creating a challenge, you are producing and air of indifference from your prospect.
by KurtMortensen


Your ego goes to work whenever someone challenges your abilities, especially your abilities to take care of your business, your quick and instinctive reaction is to show them they are wrong! When using this tactic, be cautious not to damage the ego. EXTREMELY IMPORTANT: If you cause damage instead of creating a challenge, you are producing and air of indifference from your prospect.

In a team environment sports coaches commonly use another challenge to player's egos. Lets say during practice a player isn't trying very hard, is continually late for team meetings, or keeps making the same mistake again and again. The coach uses a perfect ego based remedy. He'll bring the team together and explain what is happening with the individual player and the he makes the whole team except for that player run laps. The punishment is a challenge to the ego of this football player. Such a situation only has to happen once to be persuasive for every member of the team.

We very often have challenging messages geared directly at our egos. As an example in a multilevel meeting, managers may say they only want to work with the "go-getters" and "people that can take action." Teachers may phrase it to a student like this, "I'd like for you to do the advanced assignments." I have even seen sales representatives attack their prospect with a subtle suggestion like, "I guess you don't have the authority to make that decision." You should see the egos come alive.

Giving people credit for something they know nothing about is another example. When you give them credit for knowing something they know nothing about they generally will be quiet and let believe tat they are as smart as said they were. The catch here is they then will try to live up to the undeserved credit you gave them, just so they can lead you to believe they are really smart. You've probably heard phrases like, "You probably know..." or "You will soon realize..." These types of statements are a direct challenge to our egos.

When it comes to persuasion we are faced with a very tricky task of building up the egos of our prospects and placing our egos on hold. To be effective at persuasion you have to let go you your ego and focus on the objective at hand. You don't want to have to deal with a bruised ego. So check your ego at the door and remember your overriding purpose is on persuasion and not you.

About the Author:

Everything we want out of life is on the other side of persuasion. Find out where you are strong and what I can help you improve by taking the Persuasion IQ test, it's free and informative.
 

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